Broken Glass
Dixie told herself to concentrate on the road, and tried hard not to resent Kel's sullen silence. She'd noticed he'd gone tight lipped some time after she'd come back from the cafeteria, and, after watching several people try and fail to get him to open up, she decided not to waste her time coaxing him from his shell while they were on the clock.
She knew Stan had been returned to the care of the county lock up, and half wondered if that had anything to do with Kel's latest funk. She refused to ask about it, though. He'd made it abundantly clear the night before he was already feeling stifled by her constant companionship, when he'd locked himself out on the balcony for an hour. And this evening, when she asked if he was ready to go, he bristled and seethed, but he got up and accompanied her in sour quiet. She tried to ask him if he wanted to talk, but he answered in monosyllables. He wouldn't look at her. So she gave up and took them home, and tried not to be too mad about his behavior.
"Here we are," she said cheerfully as they pulled up in front of her building. "I don't know about you, but I am bushed. I can't wait to get out of this contraption," she said, and began tugging at her bra clasps before she even got out of the car. Kel chuckled faintly. She was relieved - it was the first sign of life he'd shown since she'd returned from lunch that afternoon.
Her relief was short lived. When they got inside, she went on to her bedroom to peel out of her day clothes, and to give Kel the privacy to change out of his own confining suit before starting dinner. But the moment she closed her bedroom door, she heard the jingle-jangle of keys, and then the firm click of a door shutting. "Kelly?" She poked her head out to the short hall. The living room was empty. "Shit."
She skipped out of her heels and darted out of the apartment in bare feet, just in time to see him round the corner to the stairwell. She ran awkwardly, practically dancing down the chilly stone steps, and grabbed the corner of his jacket just before he got out of the courtyard. She tried to make a grab for his keys, but he held them above her head, and pushed her away with his free hand. "Dammit, Dixie, you're like a damned dog with a bone!"
"What are you doing, Kel? Give me the keys!"
"No! Can't I get five damned minutes to myself!?"
"I gave you twenty minutes to yourself yesterday!”
“Yesterday?!”
“Yes, yest- alright, well, I gave you all afternoon to yourself!" Dix tried to duck away from his outstretched hand, but he blocked her easily. "Dammit, why won't you talk to me, Kelly?"
"Because I don't want to! Now let me be!" He gave her a tiny shove, just enough to get a hairsbreadth between her chest and his blocking hand, and he turned and stalked away from her.
"That's it? You can't even tell me when you'll be back?" She watched him disappear around the corner, and felt like he was slipping through her hands. "So help me, you'd better show up at work in one piece, Dr. Brackett, or I'll hate you for the rest of my life!" Someone hollered something rude from a nearby window, but she ignored it, and stared at the empty space where Kel used to be.
A moment later, he reappeared, his face a mixture of angsty guilt and deep fury. He closed the gap between them slowly. "I'll show up at work just fine," he said quietly. "I have business to take care of, and I just don't feel like discussing it, okay?"
"You could just tell me that. I'm not trying to keep you prisoner, Kel."
"But you are keeping me prisoner, Dixie, and you keep reminding me you're holding me prisoner for my own good! You have no idea how that sounds, how that makes me feel! You have no idea-" He stopped short and stared at her, his jaw working, grinding, crushing some unknown rage that she couldn't begin to guess at.
She looked away, vaguely shamed. "I'm just concerned about you. I don't want you to get hurt any worse than you have been."
"Or to hurt myself," he said darkly. She held her tongue - no point in denying it. He sighed. "I'm not going to go self destruct. I'll be fine." He shuffled his feet. She wondered if he was waiting for permission to go. "I'll be back later," he said, but he still didn't make a move to leave.
"Should I fix you a plate? Or do you want to grab something while you're out?"
He looked pained. "I don't know. Food's the last thing on my mind."
"It's been the last thing on your mind for a couple weeks now, Kel, and it's starting to show. Here," she said, and dug in her pockets. "I've got some change around here somewhere, maybe you can bring us a couple of hambur-"
"I'll be out late, Dix. I doubt you'll want to stay up that late waiting for cold hamburgers, and that's assuming I can find a place that'll cook us some that late."
She nodded. "Okay. Be safe. Here, take my house key."
"Dix, wait-"
"No, Kel, if it's gonna be too late to have dinner with you, then there's no point in me waiting up to let you in." she turned to go back inside.
"Dix!" she paused. "I..." He groaned. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? Don't be mad at me!"
She turned, arms folded. "I'm not... mad at you. I'm just - okay, I'm a little mad, and I'm sorry, I get it, you're going through something that I can't begin to understand, and I'm not helping you the right way or something, I get that. But you won't tell me what the right way to help you is! You just keep locking me out, and I'm tired of trying to beat down the door to get in. So I'm not going to do it, not tonight. You need to run off and deal with stuff, you got it. When you're ready for me, you know where I'll be."
He chewed on his lip and turned his head away from her. "I'm sorry," he said again, meekly.
"Me too." She reached out and squeezed his arm. "Listen. Do you want me to wait up? Would that be better?"
He shook his head, and began to laugh. "I've been trying to figure out all day how to escape you, you know? I had it in my head that I needed to get away from you, to go take care of this stuff by myself. But..." He took a long, shuddering breath. "The truth is, I don't want to do this alone. And I don't know who else to ask. Shit. I hate this. I'm sorry."
Dixie shook her head. "Why are you sorry now?"
"Because I want to drag you into this mess that I'm afraid to deal with on my own, and because I don't want you there, I don't want you to see any part of it, but..." He trailed off, and stared up at the inky, velvety darkness above.
"Kel," she said carefully. "You don't have anything to be sorry about. You're conflicted and upset. I get that. Look, let me change into something a little more comfortable, get some shoes on, and I'll meet you at your car. We'll go, and when we get there, you can decide if you want me to just wait for you in the car, or if you want me to come along to wherever it is you're going, okay? And then we can try to find a late night hamburger stand, and either talk about it, or talk about anything but it."
He kept his eyes heavenward, and was so quiet she almost missed his answer when it finally came. "Yeah. Okay."
"Okay. Give me two minutes." She went back in, and changed into some sweats and a pair of fuzzy slippers. She grabbed a book and a flashlight, and trotted out to meet him on the side of the building, where he leaned against his own car. His shoulders slumped and his head dragged on his chest, like he had the weight of the world straddled across his shoulders - and maybe he did. Poor baby. "Okay, I'm ready."
He raised himself slowly, and looked her over. He pointed to her feet. "I take it you don't expect to come in," he said.
She shrugged. "Is there a dress code I need to be worried about here? I can get some sandals if I must, but my feet are killing me."
He shook his head and opened the car door for her. "I'm sure they've seen more ridiculous outfits, especially in the middle of the night - which is when we're gonna get there if we don't get going now, please."
Dixie didn't imagine herself to be the kind of person to scare easy. She'd spent fifteen sticky, bloody months on the opposite side of the planet stitching together boys who looked too young to be out without a curfew, much less carrying guns through a steamy jungle halfway across the globe. She'd spent a considerably longer time honing her skills, both before and after, in free clinics and civic riots, on the enraged poor, and the disenfranchised folks trapped on the wrong side of the tracks. And she'd certainly seen her share of vengeful, spitting family members in the ER, out for blood when patients don't leave the hospital with breath in their mouths. But even Dix had her limits - and she discovered that they'd ended abruptly about two miles back.
She snuck a glance at Kel as they slowed for a red light, certain that, in his current state of mind, he had to be climbing the walls.
To her surprise, though, he appeared to be completely oblivious to their surroundings. He didn't seem to mind the ramshackle homes that were covered with padlocks and heavy duty bars. He didn't seem to notice the broken street lamps or the boarded up windows in the handful of businesses that lined the street. He didn't seem to notice the unsavory characters who stood in the shadows between the buildings, and watched.
Dix slunk down further in her seat and deeply regretted her comfy slippers. What was she thinking, coming outside so unprepared? And she'd done it without even thinking to question Kel! After all, his delicate feelings were certainly in greater need of protection than her own life!
"I think we're almost there," Kel said, and absently patted her knee. "Sorry. I didn't know we'd wind up in this neck of the woods. I guess I should have looked at the map."
Well. Maybe she was overreacting. A little. "I thought I'd be the one holding your hand, not vice versa."
Kel kept his eyes on the road, but he spared her a small smile. "You'll get your chance soon enough."
"Sure, but will I be any use by the time you're ready to hide behind my skirts? I'm a little embarrassed to say this, but this street is giving me the creeps like you wouldn't begin to believe, buster."
Kel half shrugged. "This doesn't look too different from the big streets that surround my house."
"Yeah, well, it's not like I've ever really been to your house after dark. Plus the freeway is only a couple of blocks from your place. And I know that every other block has a pretty reputable night club, stocked with tons of security guards to keep the patrons and the locals in relative safety. This? This is just miles of unchecked madness as far as the eye can see."
He didn't respond. She looked up at him, expecting to see the scowl he seemed to wear all the time lately. But instead his face was a blank, white mask, to match his white knuckled grip on the steering wheel. His eyes were open wide, like he was staring into some unknown abyss, and for a moment, Dix was afraid that was exactly what he was doing. "Kel?" She touched his shoulder, gently, hoping to bring him back to earth without jarring them into a crash. He didn't flinch, but she thought she heard the slightest whimper at her touch. "Kelly? What is it?"
"Everything is falling apart," he whispered.
She didn't like the way he was talking. "Kel, everything will be okay. You see people when they're in the height of crisis, and 9 times out of 10, they go home to live happy, productive lives. What makes you think that won't happen for you?"
"Because 1 time out of 10, nothing ever gets better, Dix. Not even a little."
Dix stared at him, dismayed. "Don't you think you're being a little irrational right now?"
"Maybe." They slowed for another red light, and, before he could bring the car to a complete stop, a swarm of young women stepped off the sidewalk en masse, and approached the handful of cars waiting for the green light.
There had to be 8 or 10 girls, and they darted from car to car, peering into windows and hiking up their already impossibly short skirts to show parts that Dix usually only saw in the line of duty or in the privacy of the bedroom.
A couple of girls peered in at them, but they both made rude faces at Dix before moving on to the next car. A third girl grinned wolfishly, licked her lips, held up three fingers, and blew Dixie a kiss. Dix shook her head meekly, and with a pout, the girl straightened up, pressing her breasts along the glass as she stood.
The light turned green, then. "Go, go," Dix said through gritted teeth.
"I don't want to hit-"
"Oh, they'll get out of the way. Get us out of here before they start an orgy on the hood of the car!"
Kel gulped, and the car lurched forward. A couple of girls standing in the street, still looking for takers, shouted unintelligibly at them as Kel swerved to avoid hitting one of them. But Dix could piece together the general message from their tone and gestures. "Sheesh, what a crazy way to earn a buck. I'm telling you, Kel, the streets around your place are nothing like this."
"Maybe it'd be better if they were," Kel said quietly.
"Now what's that supposed to mean? That doesn't even make sense!"
Instead of answering her, he slowed down again, and began peering closely at the buildings along the road. The run-down businesses which had lined the street for a mile or so soon gave way to the same style of heavily secured residences that introduced the business corridor, and he -finally - began to look less worried. He drove even more slowly until he came to a near stop in the middle of the road. A horn blared behind them, and he reached out of the window to wave the car on, before swinging a wide arc in the middle of the block. Dix craned her neck, on the alert for any watchful lawmen, but no one descended on them for the illegal u-turn.
They crawled down the opposite side of the street for a bit, and finally, with a great sigh of obvious relief, Kel turned off on a residential street. He immediately pulled into the driveway of the house on the corner, and sat there with the engine running. Dix looked at the house in confusion. There was a tiny wooden sign, stuck lopsidedly into the dry, scrubby excuse of a lawn which read, Lawson Daycare. There were no toys or swings or other signs of children in the yard. There were, though, even more security bars on the windows and doors than she'd seen on any of the other houses - or businesses, for that matter - in the immediate area.
There was also a sign in the window which read Beware of dog. Why on earth, she wondered, would a daycare have a guard dog on duty?
Kel checked his watch. "It's after 10," he said, even more quietly than before. "I hope this is the right place."
"I'm sure you're gonna tell me what pressing business you have at a daycare, in this seedy-ass neighborhood, at 10 PM, right?"
The corner of his mouth quirked up. "Actually, I think the daycare is a day gig."
"Daycare, day gig," Dix said. "Makes sense. What do they do at night though?"
Kel got out of the car without turning off the engine. "Wait here," he said, pointing to the driver's seat. He waited until she slid behind the wheel, then turned and went up the path to the front door. He knocked and waited, patiently at first. Then, as the seconds ticked by, she could see him starting to fidget. He knocked twice more, before he backed up and looked around. Dix watched with rising nervousness as Kel stepped into the dry crunchy flowerbed so he could peek into the windows.
Suddenly, a wide swath of light poured from the doorway, and a short, toadish shaped old woman hobbled out of the doorway to fuss at the strange man in her flowerbed. She waved her cane at him, and in return he gestured at the car, and put on his biggest, most charming smile, the one he saved for frightened children and, well, little old ladies. The woman stared back at him for a moment before returning to the bright indoors, slamming the door shut behind her. Dix started to put the car in gear, but Kel held his hand up. "Wait," he mouthed and went back to the front door.
A moment later, the door reopened. But instead of the toad woman, a small, whip thin figure stood in the bright light. The person didn't come out, so all Dix could see was the small sliver of silhouette, a knife slice of nothingness that cut the glaring yellow light in two.
Then, in a voice loud and sharp enough for Dix to hear through shut windows and the rumble of a running engine, the person - a woman- cried out, "Ohhhh! Hiya, Doc! Yeah, Murray's in the back. C'mon in!" He nodded and turned towards Dix, to give her a thumbs up and beckon her closer.
Dix wrinkled her nose. It seemed Kel had been expected, and he seemed marginally more comfortable than he had when they'd first pulled into the driveway. But she still didn't know where the hell they were, and the woman's loud welcome hadn't done anything to dispel the sinister aura of the house. Reluctantly, Dix killed the engine, opened the door, and swung her feet out. Once on the ground, her soft, golden, fuzzy slippers seemed to wiggle happily at her. "Shit." she threw her hands in the air, and went on up to the door where Kel and the slip of a woman waited.
She smiled nervously at the tiny woman with the booming voice. The woman tugged Dix in by the hand, shut the door in a hurry, then secured it with four different locks, before leading them down the bright hall. "Murray's just getting set up. It'll just take a minute. You want some coffee, Doc?"
"No thank you."
The woman glanced back at Dix, the offer on her face, but Dix shook her head. She was too agitated as it was. Coffee would probably be a disaster.
"M'kay, folks, right in here." The woman stopped at a heavy duty metal mesh screen door, and fiddled with keys and locks, until the door creaked open. Kel only hesitated for a moment before crossing the threshold, but Dixie stared, completely thrown. Who put a barred security door inside the house?
The woman chuckled, a little unpleasantly. "Never had to bail a friend out of the clink before, huh? Don't worry, there's nothin to be nervous about. This here?" She patted the door heavily, and the metal banged and rang through the hall. "This is mostly to keep the darling little ragamuffins my mother-in-law watches from getting into all our sensitive files. A regular old lock would do, but we got a swell deal from the company that did up the windows. Plus, it reminds Mamma Lawson that she ain't the only business owner the family, you know?"
"Oh," Dix said faintly, and followed Kel into the room.
It was an ugly, unpainted room. The drywall was half finished, leaving the interior mesh and wooden beams exposed, and harsh white fluorescent lamps hung from the ceiling on heavy chains. But in the center of the ugliness sat four comfortable looking black chairs, upholstered in some soft material that at least looked like leather. Between those sat a couple of low lacquered wood tables that wouldn't pose a physical barrier between the seated parties. In the back of the room was another shut door - just plain wood this time, with no obvious locks - with a sign that read 'Private'.
"Go on and get comfortable," the woman said. Then she turned toward the 'Private' door and bellowed, "MURRAAAAAAAAAY!!"
"Keep your shirt on," came a muffled man's voice.
"Hurry up!"
"Goddammit, Tina, I told you, I'm coming!"
"Shut up back there!" The old woman's croaky voice sounded far away, but she could be heard clearly - especially when she started hacking.
"It's fine," Kel said quickly. "We don't mind waiting."
"Oh," Tina said, and blinked at him as if waiting were the most novel idea in the world. "You sure you two don't want coffee? We're having some."
"We're fine," Dix said with a smile she didn't feel at all.
Tina shrugged, and let herself out of the security door, leaving Dix and Kel alone in the unfinished room. Dix noticed there was no clock visible in the room. Great. She checked her watch. Maybe ten minutes had passed since they'd first pulled into the driveway, but she was already itching to get out. She glanced at Kel, and saw he wasn't doing any better; he was bouncing his knee so hard and fast, Dix was sure his leg would run off without him. He was rocking back and forth, and wringing his hands together. She'd never seen him look so wound up - the man could slice people open and sew them together without breaking a sweat, but being trapped in this strange room... well, Dix wanted out like yesterday. She reached for his hands. "It's okay," she lied. "It'll be okay." He nodded and grabbed her hand with both of his and hung on for dear life.
Finally, the 'Private' door creaked open, and a short yellow ball of a man with rosy cheeks and bushy blond eyebrows shuffled into the room. He wore a fairly nice jacket over a nice, bright blue polo shirt, but Dix heard the scuff scuff of slippers on the floor, and sure enough, he was wearing little black terrycloth slippers on his wide, red feet. She smiled a little, and wiggled her toes in her own comfy slippers. The man followed her gaze, noticed her slippers in kind, and gave her a wink. He carried a manila folder in one thick, meaty hand, and held his other out to shake. "Don't get up, folks," he said. "I'm Murray Lawson, Bail bondsman, Freedom Inc. Call me Murray, okay?"
"Kel Brackett," Kel said in a strangled voice, and shook hands. "This is my friend, Dixie McCall," he said.
"Hi," Dix said, feeling a little out of place - this was Kel's business, not hers. She felt like an intruder. But Murray shook her hand with a warm smile. His hand was strong and dry and almost hot to the touch.
Murray settled down into one of the chairs across from them, and looked at them like he was drinking them in. Maybe he was. "Okay, first things first," he said, and opened his folder. He pulled out a couple of sheets, and spread them out, so Dix and Kel could see the paperwork clearly. Then he pulled out his wallet, fished out a card, and plopped it right in the middle of the paperwork. "This," he said, pointing to what Dix realized had been his driver's license, "is my ID." He let them examine it thoroughly before putting it back in his wallet, and pointed to the first sheet he'd puled out. "This is my license with the state of California to provide surety bond services, okay? It means that I'm authorized to post bail, and to essentially act as a baby sitter for the accused, until the charges are dropped, or the case has finished. Any questions so far?"
Kel gulped. "A million, but I guess I'll just follow your lead for now."
"Not a problem, not a problem," Murray said. "Are we throwing in together on this, or just one of you?"
Dix opened her mouth to answer, but Kel said quickly, "Just me. She's here for moral support."
"Right on. Okay." He pushed the second sheet closer to Kel. "Fill this out for me. Using what you give us, we'll have Tina fish out your...friend? Your friend's information. That'll tell us how much his bond is, which is where we'll need to start. Meanwhile, I'll explain how the process works, okay? No money leaves your pocket until you sign, and you don't sign until you feel perfectly comfortable with your knowledge of the process and all the possible alternatives. Okay?"
"Fish out his information?" Dix asked.
Murray turned to her with a smile. "You see, depending on what Kel here gives us, we're going to call the appropriate holding facility, to find out what's going on with your friend. From there, we decide what we're gonna do about getting your friend out - you might decide you don't need our services, and to pay in full, in cash, or you might decide that you need us more than ever, or you might even decide that you want to wash your hands of the whole thing!" Dix glanced at Kel, who looked painfully close to doing exactly that. Murray tapped the top of the sheet. "It's a simple process, folks, and Tina's real quick, so this won't take long. And the more information you give us, the faster it goes!"
The metal door clanged open just then, and Tina returned with a pair of steaming mugs of delicious smelling coffee. She passed one to Murray, and stood right over Kel, clicking her fingernails on her hot mug. As soon as Kel set his pen down, Tina snatched up the paper and scurried off into the private room with her coffee.
"Okay," Murray said. "While she's taking care of that, I'll give you the rundown on what you're agreeing to, before you dig into the fine print. You're gonna pay an amount equal to 10% of your friend's bail. That's important, now - you're not paying 10% of his bail, you're paying an amount equal to that 10%. That's my fee, and that amount is required by the state, and is non-refundable - but you don't pay that until you sign on the line, remember. Okay, what's gonna happen basically, is you're paying a small portion of the bail to me, so that I go and owe the court the whole amount, until all of this gets straightened out, one way or the other. Now, you gotta promise that your friend will make all his court dates - otherwise, bail is forfeited, and the court's gonna expect me to pay it. And the way I pay, is I get the money from you."
Dix gasped and looked at Kel in alarm. But Kel only looked resigned. "I take it that's why I needed personal property deeds?"
Murray grinned and rubbed his hands together. "Tina helped you out on that, huh? Good job, good good good. Yep, if I have to collect, that's what'll happen. But if he does what he's supposed to do, you will get your collateral back. That's regardless of his legal outcome. So, bottom line: as long as he's where he's supposed to be, you'll be okay. Again, the 10%? No refunds, that's gone, sayonara. Your collateral? That's up to your buddy." Murray pulled out a sheath of paperwork. "There's more details on your responsibilities in here, but I won't have you read over all this mess until we get the word on where your buddy stands right now. Depending on the dollar amount, you might just go on back to bed."
Dix saw Tina slip out of the office, and approach her husband with greatly diminished enthusiasm, clutching the sheet Kel had filled out in both her tiny hands. "Honey?"
Murray's cheery smile dropped from his face in an instant, and he took the sheet with murmured apologies to Kel and Dix. He looked it over, and his bushy eyebrows drew closer and closer together, until it looked like someone had taped a yellow feather duster to the top of his face. Dix glanced at Kel, whose face was slowly draining of all color. She cleared her throat. "Is there something wrong?"
"Possibly," Murray said. "Probably." He gave Tina the sheet back, and looked at her. She scowled a little, gave him a shrug and a nod, and tiptoed over to the empty seat to perch at the edge. Murray seemed lost in thought for a moment, but he leaned forward, with great sympathy on his face, and began to speak. "Okay. Here's the deal. The bail is really high. Over ten grand." Kel hissed in surprise. "The bail is likely set that high to keep your friend behind bars." Murray paused, obviously struggling with his report. "Also, the crime listed was a little... unusual. Just... how close are you to the defendant?"
"What difference does that make?" Dix asked.
"Could be a big difference. Do either of you understand the nature of the crime? Or even what he's been accused of?"
Kel closed his eyes. "Oh yes," he said. "I know. He and I were close."
"How close?" Murray insisted.
"Why?" Dix asked. "Why does that matter?"
"Because if your friend jumps bail, you could be left holding the bag, in more ways than one. If a defendant does more than just miss a court date, if he actually jumps bail, you're going to be the first people I send my bail enforcers to see. Quite frankly, I don't know how many people would be willing to face a that kind of a mess."
Kel rubbed his temples with both hands. Dix thought he looked like he was at the end of a fraying rope. "We're close. He's my com- my former companion. I understand the... controversy of the accusation. But his life is in danger as long as he remains behind bars. And I'm not worried about him jumping bail. He's a lawyer. If he tries to get out of this, he'll do so legally." Kel smiled sadly. "And, honestly, if he does jump bail, well... I've already given the house up for lost."
Dixie suddenly understood Kel's earlier affliction in the car, and felt terrible for whining about the merits of his old neighborhood. Murray seemed to understand the awful hurt Kel was shouldering too - maybe better than Dix did, since he dealt with this sort of heartache all the time. He nodded. "Okay. Tina, get the paperwork ready. Let's try to get Stanford out of the big house before sunup."